Wednesday, August 31, 2011

The edge of my comfort zone

The edge of my comfort zone..

(started this a couple days ago but it needed a good ending)

It's been a while since I've done one of my greatest loves, which is:  this.

Typing, channeling, giving words to my thoughts, scribbling something out of nothing, speaking emotions into life...  

I've been missing this, but I have been busy.  Busier than normal.  Busier than I normally would care to be.  But a different busy than I have ever experienced.

Chances are on my best day, I'm accomplishing about half as much as I want to be, but...  Each day I'm learning my limits, my strengths, my weaknesses, and when to say yes and when to say no.

There have been some things that I just can't commit to, and other things God has stirred for me to get involved in that I never thought I would.  

This new season of life has been a wonderfully wild adventure.  I love it, I'm highly uncomfortable with it, but I really really love it.

I'm learning that God grows me when I'm not in my comfort zone, when I dare to step out of my regular, and when I realize where I am is indeed where He wants me...

I get this resounding feeling that this is all prep work for the next season of my journey.  I don't know if that's our foster journey, my mentoring journey, my work journey, or all-encompassing, but I know He is teaching me just the same.

As we add to our family in the coming months, I pray for the understanding and peace to rest in the unknown journey.  

I keep thinking about one year ago, where I was physically, mentally, and spiritually and how I never thought I would find fulfillment in anything other than what I was doing - and now I realize in such a profound way that::

It has never been about me... Not what I do, where I work, what activities I involve myself in, where I volunteer, etc etc etc...

It's about seeing His glory in each and embracing that it is all about Him and where He leads me.

I went from investing myself a little in a lot of things, to now honing in to a few things that I invest my time and talents in greatly... For that is the true commission.

And that is where He wants me in the beauty of His unknown.

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